From birth to the age of eight to ten, children live in a state of deductive awareness. They lack the ability to respond to circumstances like we as adults do. Their responses will be based on what they have learned from the environment they are surrounded by.
When it comes to tennis – particularly if you are a tennis playing family – it is important to realise and accept that the behaviour of your child on the tennis court is largely due to what they have learned…from YOU!
For a young player to “Be their best” rather than focusing on “Being the best” can make a significant difference in their emotional upbringing.
A child who focuses is on becoming ‘their’ best develops high self-esteem and greater emotional mastery. A child left to focus on results alone, slowly becomes a product of their results. Tennis can serve (pardon the pun) many great life lessons. Because in tennis, you cannot control 100% of the game. There are certain things that we totally control, semi-control and have zero control over.
Focusing solely on results means you are focusing on something that you influence but do not have total control over. You only influence how another person plays. Time spent dwelling on things outside of your control can cause feelings of diminished self-esteem, helplessness and eventually lead to feelings of unworthiness.
Champions focus heavily on the things they can control (80%). The remainder is spent on the things that they can semi-control (20%) and the things outside of their control receive very little attention. Here is an example from another sport to illustrate how these same principles of success apply regardless of the sport.
Swimmer Ian Thorpe rarely talks about world rankings or gold medals. He only ever talks about fulfilling his unique potential as an athlete and as a person. He knows that there are factors outside of his control when it comes to the outcome of an event. Tennis matches are no different. There will be days when the other player is just too good. Learning to accept this and learn from it is the key to success.
Scott is the author of The Power of Subconscious Goal Setting, Psycho Tennis, 23 Mental Laws of Tennis and more. Also a former ITF Pro and has been coaching for 14 years. For more information visit
www.PsychoTennis.com
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